Good morning! It’s October. We are 3/4 of the way through 2016 and 3/4 through this photo week challenge. If you’ve been with me this far, thank you! I always feel surprised when people tell me they read my blog then guilty for not producing “content” of higher quality. So – 13 more weeks of this – for this year, at least. Baby steps to higher quality content.
I’ve found myself “chasing sunrises” these last few times I’ve been out on a run in the early morning, since the sun rises later now – I put that in quotes because it sounds so cheesy. I’ve always been skeptical of sunrises. It’s not really an instant moment that you can catch – it’s more like a slow fade of gradually shifting colors and sounds and before you know it daytime is here.
But it sounds all nice and pretty to wait for the sunrise, doesn’t it?
I’ve been telling people lately that a major struggle I’ve found myself in during my young adult post-grad life is the lack of a definitive goal or milestone I’m waiting to accomplish and not knowing what to do about it. I need that marker of time passing, of accomplishment, of graduation and a chapter closing. I’m beginning to think that maybe it’s not that I need something to signify the accomplishment, but that I want that feeling of something new beginning.
It’s no secret I like lists and the start of the new year and new journals starting on auspicious dates – but now I’m realizing that it’s possible I am just living for the next new thing rather than figure out how to live with what I have now. It seems incredibly boring, to be honest. It seems boring and dreary to think about being an engineer and commuting and waking up to just the same old business for the next 35 to 40 years. (I originally wrote 25 – haha, early retirement? Just kidding..)
But – for every article written for and by millennials that tells me now is the time to do what you love and it is totally possible to drop everything in pursuit of happiness and freedom (and finanicially responsible, too!) there seems to be a counter, written-for-and-by millennials article that says you can be happy where you currently are! (And here’s how in 15 steps with 5 steps on how to make your mornings more productive.)
And then, it seems like as an Asian American and a Christian I should be happy where I am with my current lot in life – and if I’m not, I should change my outlook on life not my circumstances.
I wonder if I’ve falllen into the social media trap on this blog – only showing pretty things and fun events. So – if you’ve read this far, congrats! My goal for the next three months is to be more realistic here. In my Photo Week posts, in what I write – and of course, hoping that leads into being more real in actual relationships. I don’t have any sort of conclusions and yeah, life sucks sometimes, but you’re not alone and neither am I.
Cheers to the last quarter of 2016!